My amazing friend sat with Nora my entire workout, I had a cheering squad. Nora did so great sitting so quiet and patiently. I’m hoping to keep that up!
Then we had vibes this afternoon. I don’t know if it was something in the air but basically EVERY kid in the class was whiny and cranky.
Nora sat in this thing for about 20 seconds. She wasn’t too sure about it and a little cranky herself, because teeth. Poor girl is finally getting her top teeth (I’ve been blaming teething for past crankiness but they are finally emerging). Sleep has been hit or miss lately; she’s a drooling, runny nose little girl and I hope these teeth cut through soon, more so for her sake.
Recently, the wonderful girls at my gym started a challenge; an accountability challenge to be exact. We each are focusing on one thing, maybe some more than one, that we are challenging ourselves to do: eat better, workout more, no sugar, no pop, etc. And while I do eat pretty good for the most part, my challenge for myself was to be an inspiration; an inspiration to my daughter (and if I inspire others along the way even better!). I’ll admit I haven’t worked out much since having Nora. But I am allowing my body to heal; to adjust to not having a child inside. I’m being kind to my body and myself-which is part of my challenge as well.
I want my daughter to grow up seeing me workout and staying fit; to see that working out is a part of our daily routine–something you just do, not HAVE to do. I want her to see that women’s bodies are capable of amazing things, and that muscles and strength are beautiful and empowering. I want her to meet all these amazing women of Crossfit that I have become friends with; all shapes and sizes–and that we are all capable of amazing things. I want her to see women uplifting each other and not tearing each other down. I want her to love her body for what it is and what it is capable of doing; maybe if she sees what my body is capable of –lifting heavy weights, doing a 20 minute intense WOD (workout of the day) and making a HUMAN! –then she will realize she is just as capable of it as well. I want her to do her best to brush off what other people say about her–that all that matters is what she thinks of herself; to be comfortable in her own skin.
Being a woman is tough business and raising one will be tough too. But being a women is also awe-inspiring; prove all the nay-sayers wrong, prove yourself right! I can only hope that she realizes her potential and aspires to reach it. That is tries something and fails, that she try again.
I’m still working up to Crossfitting more than 2-3 times a week (prep-pregancy I was working out 5-6x/week). Some days I just don’t feel like it and want to cuddle with Nora, other days I know I just haven’t eaten enough to sustain me through the WOD (workout of the day) and still breastfeed my daughter. I’m still getting back into the swing of things. I ended up buying my barbell, some weights and pull-up bar. I figure it’ll be more likely for me to get a WOD in at home then load up Nora, make sure she’s fed, and go to the gym. At least in these first months while she is basically exclusively breastfed, that’ll be my best bet in getting in a workout. I know it takes time to get your body back after a baby, and I am trying to not be too hard on myself for it. But it makes it even harder to look at my body right now and not be critical–I was in the best shape of my life before I got pregnant. And while I don’t regret anything about being pregnant or having my daughter, I am still my hardest critic–which most women are. I’m still learning and I think will forever be working on my self-image and being confident. I recently saw a blurb on women and self worth, and the motto was: I AM ENOUGH! Yes I am.
Nora and I both got a workout in today; mine in my make-shift garage gym and Nora in our basement. I did a Crossfit workout and she worked on some tummy time. This has only been my 3rd or 4th workout on the barbell, but I can definitely tell I am gaining some strength back–that barbell isn’t feeling nearly as impossible to lift–it actually felt pretty good today. I’m still lifting light and keeping my workouts fairly short to ease myself back in. Plus, I am trying to make sure I’m eating enough to not only breastfeed but sustain my workouts. My legs felt a little like jell-o after a few sets of squats, but I have come to like that feeling thanks to three years of Crossfit.
Back squat 5×5 55#-75#
Push Press 5×5 55#-75# THEN:
Nora worked on strengthening her neck muscles with some tummy time. She isn’t a huge fan of being on her belly (even when being burped, I usually put her on her side on my chest), but she sure likes looking in the mirror–and who wouldn’t like looking at that pretty face! We do it for as long as she can handle, a couple times a day. While sitting she holds her head up pretty good, but obviously still has a little ways to go before she has full control over it, but it won’t be long. 🙂
Last night was my first night back at Crossfit. I hadn’t gone in five weeks, save for the few home WODs I did, and before that during my pregnancy I was scaling my workouts, watching my heart rate and lifting lighter. I have to admit I was a little nervous going back at it today; not only because I had been out so long, but hoping Nora could keep it together while my friend watched her at the gym. Nora made it though the workout, I however did not. I have never in my 3 years of doing Crossfit quit a WOD, but last night it happened. I literally felt like I was drained of energy and nothing left to give; feeling light-headed and shaky I threw in the towel. I knew part of it was that I hadn’t ate enough throughout the day, but I think I also had too high of expectations going into the workout. I’m not an elite athlete by any means, but I could hold my own ok before I got pregnant. I thoroughly expected to just pick up where I left off with no problem. Not the case. The barbell felt so much heavier than I expected (at 75 pounds, not typically a heavy weight for me, I didn’t think it would be that difficult for me), my boobs are bigger so running was REAL fun (remember: wear 2 sports bras), box jumps felt like 50″ high….everything was a real struggle. I know every day will get better and I will eventually get my strength back, I just need to give it time. I am one of those people who want instant gratification and I need to realize that’s pretty unrealistic, along with most other things in life.